Life Begins at 40.

It was a week or so ago when I found the article on the veteran Japanese tennis player Kimiko Date-Krumm. 

Until now I didn’t realize that she was the same age as I.

Yesterday I celebrated my 40^th in a pouring rain. 

Ian and I were at the Thai restaurant on Brunswick Street, Fitzroy, watching the people walking up and down the street. 

Lightening flashed and thunder roared. 

Outside, young guys and girls on their way from parties and drinks huddled together under the awning.

Well, the rain was pouring alright, but it was Friday night. There were still heaps of people out, eating and partying, wow-ing at the lightenings, just like we did. 

It was quite amazing.

For some strange reason, 40 was the age I was looking forward to.

January was a horrible month. First there was the tragedy in Queensland, and next was my own DinoDirect debacle. Now I feel sort of content again that I have done all I could.

And I still have a good feeling about this year.

Then again, I haven’t felt doomed for over 5 years.

My turning point was when I met Ian. He was the one who made me stronger and transformed me into a confident, more cheerful type.

I don’t believe in the word “I have no regrets”, not when I’m still half way through my life, not even when I’m nearly there – not until I’m actually there...I mean, at the end of my life.

I have many regrets that I’ve learned a great deal from.

Regrets can turn into challenges, right? 

The next time around, whatever the regret is about, you will do your best to do it right and more often than not, you will (do that right).
If not, you will do it better. 

That way, you take regret away from your life, one by one.

At least that is what I believe.

With Kimiko Date-Krumm, there’s no denying that she doesn’t have the same energy that she had in her 20s, but she has the skills even more developed than at her peak to cover her disadvantages. 

The article written by the guy called Paul McNamee cut right into my heart. 

Which titled, "Life begins at 40." (This is a fabulous writing, check this out.)

In the article he mentioned 1996 Wimbledon semi-final where she had the grueling game against then-world number one Steffi Graff.

I clearly remember watching that game with my eyes glued on the TV screen.

The way that Paul guy summed up the Wimbledon semifinal 1996 was so spot-on that it made me emotional.

When the game was suspended because of "fading light", reasoned by the umpire, I cursed and screamed in my head. It seemed ridiculous as the sun was still high enough…

In that minute, everyone knew that the momentum had gone.

Looking back, I still think she would’ve won that game if the game was played on that night.

During her retirement speech, 26-year-old Kimiko Date put on brave face as she said that she was happy to have achieved as high as she had.

It could've been even higher than what she had imagined herself. 

Back in 1996, I was one of many Japanese who secretly believed that she could make it to world No.1. 

And of course, I blamed her for her crushing under the pressure just like that (although I'm very kind to myself). 

The pressure and expectation must have been too much for young Kimiko Date.

In one of the interviews she had overseas (I think it was in Australia), she told the interviewer that the reason she came back to playing tennis was because her husband hassled her into. 

Come on, Kimiko. He just knew that you wanted to play tennis. He (the German car racer Michael Krumm) just gave you the little push you needed!!!

If 40 is the beginning of the second life, I’m just a new-born.

I don’t know yet what future holds.

I may have more regrets, more lessons to learn from.

I am so clever. I'm so invincible…Oh, AS IF.

Life has just started now, you stupid! :D