Today was another full-on day, but I believe that I coped with the pressure a lot better this time.
Sometimes I get so pissed off, so frustrated and whigey.
You observe something not quite fair, not quite right, but can't say anything.
You want to say it aloud if you could, but you don't want to dob someone in.
- I know people do back-stab other people all the time, but I can't and don't want to.
I know. I'm self-contradicted.
Whether I say it aloud or not doesn't change the situation, and me getting frustrated doesn't achieve anything other than exacerbating my condition. All what's left is the never-ending dilemma.
So I decided to overcome my confidence wobble from two days ago, with the support from my boss, supervisor and other volunteers.
I am aware that my boss is pleased with me performance-wise, but he also knows that I have some 'trust' issues. Suppose that I haven't adapted into Australian way as yet.
I asked him if I'm being too square, if I should be more 'flexible', and I started talking about some incidents ... then I faltered. Then my voice faded away.
He is really good at reading one's mind, he sort of knew what I was getting at without me having to finish the talk that I could't finish anyway.
Some people are flexible in both good ways and bad ways, I do understand. Just that I was having trouble accepting it.
Talking to my boss and one of my workmates reminded me that there are people who understand me and know what's going on.
Many epileptics tend to get anxious and frustrated more easily than average people, but I think I can defeat this issue.
After going through this challenging week, I'm even more determined to master 'customer service' skill, because it might get me somewhere in the future.