I'll be setting off to Japan in two days.
This feels so surreal.
And I have hardly packed anything yet.
In the lounge are still full things that do not actually belong to us.
"Too many things to be done before I go," I think,
And yet I don't feel like doing anything.
It maybe because I'm so used to going on a trip with Ian and doing all the packing together.
Oh, I don't want to go.
But I do want to go.
Sometimes you can't have everything.
I know that. You don't have to remind me.
Two weeks without Ian.
It feels so bizarre.
Although I have known that I'm going on my own,
It still hasn't sunk in yet.
We have a lot of catching up to do,
After I come back from Japan.
As you can't be with me this time,
As I can't have you with me in Japan this time.
I know I can't have everything.
I don't have to be reminded.
But I miss you.